Around 8 PM, my back started killing me! I laid down in bed and tried to relax, and I noticed the contractions were getting progressively worse, so I started timing them. I was CONVINCED I was going to be late my whole pregnancy and so even up to this point, I just thought this was my body telling me I am going into labor in the next week or so. I tried falling asleep, but the contractions would not go away!! Jordan had been helping me time the contractions while we were in bed and by 11 PM or midnight, he had conked out. The funny thing was Jordan had been anxious & excited all week, he wanted James to come ASAP. I would mention to him that I was not feeling well, and he would say, "do we need to go to the hospital???" My response every time was, "TRUST ME, I will let you know when the time comes, and we need to head to the hospital." Well the time had finally come around 2 AM and Jordan was snoring his life away. I woke him up and we headed to the hospital. The nurses checked me and I was only dilated to a 2 and effaced 80%. I KNEW that was going to happen--I would go to the hospital with the most unbearable contractions and hardly be dilated.
The nurses called Dr. Palmer and she was a little hesitant since I wasn't dilated much, but I was thinking, "PLEASE don't let me go home, I am in the WORST pain". Dr. Palmer showed up around 5 am and they decided to give me some stadol since she was about to break my water (she wanted to speed up the process a little), which could be very painful without pain medication. The stadol made me a little loopy but totally relaxed me. Then they gave me an epidural. Dr. Palmer told me to relax and even take a nap if possible because nothing would happen until around noon. I was like "What? Take a nap during labor?" It just felt weird trying to rest during actual labor, but I did what I was told and went in and out of sleep for a few hours since I hadn't slept all night. After I while, I noticed my epidural wasn't working and I could feel the contractions! So I pinched myself on my arm and then on my hip (where the epidural was supposed to numb me) and could feel it perfectly. Fear set in and I kept having the same thought over and over. 'What if my hips are too small and I can't deliver the baby and need an emergency c section. If they cut me, I will feel the whole thing.' Several times during my pregnancy, people had told me there's no way I could deliver a baby because I was too small. Even though I tried to let it go in one ear and out the other, when the time came, I started believing it. So I began sobbing and asking Jordan to have them fix it. I was more scared than in pain. So they decided to redo it, however, they gave me more stadol in the meantime. This time it made me even MORE LOOPY. I remember talking non stop and even saying to the nurses and doctors, "I know I am talking a lot but I can't help it." I also remember the nurses laughing a lot and I know it was because I was saying crazy things, but I couldn't remember what I said after I said it.
I was in and out of sleep for the next couple hours and I remember hearing I was dilated at a 5... then a 7...the stadol was wearing off, so I was gaining more consciousness. I remember thinking I LOVE this stuff, is there any way they can give me more? I liked it way better than the epidural because although I could still feel pain, I was extremely relaxed and calm. I asked the nurses if I could have more and told them I could care less about the epidural. They gave me this whole speech on how they couldn't because I am getting closer to delivering and it can pass onto James. Then I would turn to Jordan and ask him if I could have more stadol. Once again, he would give me the same speech. As the nurses left, I turned to Jordan and whispered, "PLEASE can I just have a little more?" I was bummed to hear him say the same answer. I think I may have asked him several more times, can't really remember though. Then the nurse told me to push on my next contraction, so I did as I was told. I was now a 10 and it was time for me to push. WHAT? I thought, "that was fast".
Dr. Palmer and 2 nurses gathered around me as I began pushing. The stadol still wasn't completely worn off, so I was still talking a ton and saying crazy stuff. I remember after 10 minutes of pushing saying "OK, now I got this, I know how to push now!" then asking Dr. Palmer how I was doing and telling her I had strong abs. WHAT IN THE WORLD WAS I SAYING!! At one point I heard a squeak and I turned to Jordan and asked "Was that the baby's voice?" He started busting out laughing. First of all, a baby doesn't have a voice, secondly, I think it would be more of a screaming cry than a squeak if it was the baby. Finally after 30 minutes of pushing, he was here at 3:30 PM weighing 6 pounds, 13 ounces, 19 inches long! To say I was overwhelmed with love & joy is an understatement. I can't even describe how much love I felt for him immediately. It was one of the greatest days of my life and I am SO thankful to the Lord for such a great delivery & healthy baby. We love you baby James!